Jesus Mary Josepeh
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Reflections

 

Sympathetic spouse… A man, whose wife is a terrible cook, comes home to find her in a flood of tears.  The woman cries, “It’s just awful – the cat ate your supper!”  The man replies reassuringly,  “Don’t  worry, sweetheart, we’ll buy a new cat.”

 

Signs you might be broke … (1) You vacuum your couch looking for change.  (2) American Express calls and says, “Leave home without it.”  (3) You think of a lottery ticket as an investment.  (4) You walk the streets and pick up what is left of other people’s cigarettes to smoke in your old pipe; because you can’t even afford any roll-your-own tobacco.

 

Cowboy logic… “Live every day like it’s yer last, ‘cause someday you’re gonna be right.

 

A “friend” is …someone who goes around saying nice things about you behind your back.

 

“Middle age” is … when your age starts to show around your middle.

 

Don’t ask … First businessman: “I made a million dollars last year.”  Second businessman: “Honestly?”  First businessman: “Well, let’s not go into that!”

 

A “boss” is … someone who comes in to work early when you are late, and comes in late when you are early.

 

An “optimist” is …someone who sees the opportunity in every challenge;  a “pessimist” is… someone who sees the challenge in every opportunity.

You might have a boring job if… (1) You’ve built an exact replica of the Eiffel Tower in your office using only paper clips.  (2) You have visited every Web site in the world.  (3) Your doctor says you’re starting to glow from overexposure to photocopier radiation.  (4) You think life as an Amish traffic cop might be exciting.